Mental, Emotional, And Spiritual Breakdown

Everyone who has had a breakdown of some sort is not weak, crazy, or dangerously unstable.

A breakdown is spiritual within many instances. A Yoruba priestess even acknowledged this fact to me years ago. I know firsthand as my own mother was a victim of brujeria in the early 1980’s.

I was even targeted. My aunt tried to flip me out when I was eighteen years of age by putting the hallucinogenic drug mescaline into a hot pot of black eyed peas that I had cooking over the stove.

People often use recreational “trip” drugs to increase the chance or enhance the effect of mental and chemical alterations of the brain while also performing the negative spiritual influences within black magic/voodoo/witchcraft.

My aunt went a step further in her malicious attempt by also putting tainted hiv fluids inside my food. Anyone educated would know the disease would not survive within the air and within a pot of scalding hot water.

Nevertheless, I didn’t lose my head or have a breakdown, my mind was too strong with faculty and awareness, and I didn’t, of course, become infected with aids either.

I was young, innocent, and very spiritually inclined, so divine intervention took over and protected me.

My aunt Tina (Ernestine Lawrence) has been hiv positive since the 1980’s due to intravenous drug use and promiscuous behavior from the 1970’s on up and instead of using her limited time to spend changing her life around for the better, she continued to do tons of constant dirt. She and other envious and jealous ruthless dummies, whores, drug addicts, and degenerates attacked me and other family for decades.

They’ve in addition done it to others, however, when they came after my mother and I, they messed with the wrong individuals. We are people of the light and they are people of the darkness. My ancestors and orishas were ready for them all, and the universe was recording and keeping record of every notorious deed in which was repeatedly done toward us.

Tina had poisoned food of my mother’s years ago too while neighbors were working black magic/voodoo/witchcraft against her.

My grandfather was driven to mental affliction before he was killed and found dead in the Hudson river.

My aunt Charise was drugged and raped which caused her to be afflicted with mental illness.

My grandfather, mother, younger aunt, and I were targeted for manipulative breakdowns because we were all very smart, strong, and fighters who could literally kick ass if needed be. We weren’t the type to back down or be bullied by anyone, and we were all good upstanding people.

The intent for causing mental, emotional, and spiritual breakdowns are to weaken one, to render them as incredible, and to lower their self esteem and spirit.

Certain evildoers want those of us who have knowledge in which threaten their unscrupulous ways either dead or labeled as crazy.

 

 

 

A Nonsexual Caulbearer In A Sexual And Sexist World

I am a person born of the caul who happens to be asexual and that has been disturbing to individuals who are twisted. I just unfortunately in the past had lived and grown up in a neighborhood full of sick and low-minded people in which I was far set apart from within mind and character.

Luckily, I was always able to branch out and come across and meet those of a higher vibration and of versatile range that I could relate to and appreciate all throughout my life as I went different places unbeknownst to the assholes who remained amongst the fellow likes of themselves and who couldn’t go no further.

There were men whose sisters, nieces and daughters had got hurt or dogged out by men and there was nothing to talk about when it came to me.

What was so special about LaToya? Why didn’t she get caught up out there?

This is the absurd way in which these degenerate people thought and we have people like this and who generate within this fashion all over the place.

So these neighborhood people had for years endeavored to calculate an unnatural situation through the use of deceptive black magic along with lies to create a facade of camouflaging negativity toward my life that would coincide with and shadow up the celestial light of my true destiny and fate.

They tried to bring me into their darkness and cover me within a glue of a paint so ugly and stagnant in color. A substance of demonic craft they didn’t ensure for me to vehemently peel away from.

I think at one time adversaries were spreading and also wanted me to believe that I was a whore with diseases, a prostitute, and other off the wall things, I don’t know for sure if I was suppose to be a drug addict too, and I also think that because I wasn’t fazed by this nonsense I was supposed to be either crazy or putting up a front because their conspiracy of fabrications was supposed to be my ultimate truths even though they all knew what they were doing.

They wanted me to appear lower than what they were so everything they had done within their lives they put on me to make themselves feel better and they intended for their lies to follow me for the rest of my life in payback for me not having been in the same category as them as they perceived me as to think that I was better than them.

In spite of all the dirt these people have directed toward me it has not killed my spirit or brought me down.

The words bitch and whore don’t faze me. I’ve never been intimidated or affected by utterances intended to bring down a woman’s confidence or self-esteem. If anything, I was further liberated and elevated in discerning that I was at a higher level of knowledge and spiritual consciousness.

I don’t know how much this would resonate with other Caulbearer’s who had to go through shit or just others who stood out for whatever reasons but when it came to a man and sex people around my old neighborhood really yearned for me to get swallowed up in the same holes they had gotten trapped into.

My father’s sister told my father years ago that “I was too hard for a girl”.

“Really?” I had thought to myself. I didn’t know that as a female I was supposed to be weak or defined as what society projected an acceptable or proper female out to be. All I knew is how to be my true self and I wasn’t changing that for anyone or to meet anyone’s bias standards.

No one can dictate to me how I should be or not be as a genuine female within my own distinct mode of character.

One thing in which really struck me as quite odd and ridiculous is among the particular gutter-rats and certain people on a low-level within mentality and intellect where I grew up around who for some outrageous reason erroneously took for granted and automatically expected me to have had an interest in men, an attraction, or sexual desire, just because most people were wired or designed, or came out to be this way, whereas I never did, never was, and never will, and it came to be an actual subject of silly gossip and idle debate.

Of course, when we’re not like everyone else and don’t exude the same type of behavior as the majority or as average it gets noticed and talked about.

Others who aren’t thoroughly acquainted with us (even those who may have been around us for years) enough make quick assumptions or generalizations about our character taking into presumption that we must have the same needs, wants, mindsets, emotions, shortcomings and/or etc… And these drawn up conclusions are not always the case within many people’s nature and everday lifestyles.

I’ve been told personally by certain others that I’m very unique and that there’s no one out there who is like me. Though I do know there are a variety of distinct individuals within existence who differ greatly as this is a huge world in which we all live in, but for the most part, these people were just acknowledging to me that I was a rare person from their own observation and perception.

A distant relative of mine had even stated to my mother that it wasn’t normal for me to not have any nature (sexual appetite). I strongly disagreed because to me it is not about what is so called normal but it is about what serves as being healthy to one and within one’s own nature and life. The way I am is indeed normal to me, however, to each his or her own.

Why was the fact that I and my vagina didn’t need or want the undesirable pounding of a penis or the attention of any man so interesting and prone to circulating?

So spread out and disappointing to the point where it created hostility and denial on the part of those who for jealous reasons of their own preferred that I innately share the same tendencies and susceptibilities as they did?

I was born with my own individual attributes.

No man can do anything for me mentally or physically and I don’t express this to be harsh but I have to convey because it is the absolute truth. It is important for one to not repress who they really are on account of other people’s judgments due to a lack of knowledge in specific areas on their part.

It is very unhealthy for one to do so.

I don’t know why sex is so important and significant to these people. I don’t understand why they believed or hoped that if I indulged in the sexual act or had a man attempt to degrade me with nonsense talk equivalent to a mediocre mindset in regard to false sexual encounters or the delusion of what they believed to be would actually have any bearing or reflection on me as they gambled so hard on the outcome and for it to follow me within my life as if it was something legitimate.

It’s also sad how sex sells and how sex is promoted the way that it is when in my opinion intercourse itself actually means nothing. I have written many articles and quite a few were editors picks in online publishing and magazines yet it was the article that I wrote about being Asexual that prompted a few publishers to contact me for permission to display them as they thought the write up was “powerful” and beneficial.

I didn’t mind at all it’s just out of all the things I have written about it’s the one regarding not having any interest in sex or men that catches the most attention?

Society is too sex crazed that it clouds their judgment when it comes to those who have no true interest in sexual matters.

 

The Power Of Nature

Ever since I was a young child I knew that if there was something that I didn’t want within my life then the situation was not going to work out.

Only the things that I preferred and under the circumstances in which I truly desired would instances turn out favorably and long lasting to my concordance.

I was never the type of female that ever hoped to one day get married and have children. I didn’t initially yearn to be a mother, when the idea later on within young adulthood came into mind to have a child it was with the intention of being a single parent, yet I eventually changed my mind about having a baby altogether and it was the right choice for me.

If I did have a child though it definitely would have been on my own without a man involved in the picture.

I fortunately grew up in a home without my father present and that is the way I liked it as I grew up strong, confident, independent and liberated-not implying that females that are raised in homes with their father’s can’t turn out that way-it was just an advantage that served a great purpose for me.

When I was little I never wished for or thought about having a dad around and when I saw other children that parents were married or together as a couple it was a situation that I didn’t require to be in I was very content and accustomed to my family order with me and my mom.

I wasn’t alone either there were other kids like me whose mothers raised them without a father it was normal to us. I can’t speak on how they actually felt about the matter, however, everything suited me just fine.

My mother never had any problems out of me I was a good child.

One thing I hated though was when guys were attracted to me or interested in me whether their intentions were good or bad I didn’t care, I wasn’t flattered by any of the attention I was genuinely turned off by it.

And it feels so good that I don’t have to go through undesirable and unsavory individuals who use to send to me the annoying invasions of mind transference through voodoo/black magic.

They had been doing it within many ways for many years within different techniques but with the same motives and that was to bring me down to their level.

Whether it was to attempt to lower my self esteem or to get me to have feelings for a man they worked hard at it and failed miserably.

These people were jealous and resentful because I’d never been hurt or dogged out by a man as so many of them had even the guys were envious and jealous of me they all figured if I was in the same predicament as they were I couldn’t or wouldn’t think that I was better than any of them.

They were also jealous and envious of my intelligence and knowledge and where I could go within life if and when the opportunity arose.

They had such a warped sense of mindset that didn’t correspond with mine in the least if they had succeeded in their designs I’d still be the person who I am today with the same mentality no man could ever break me or kill my spirit. I wasn’t built within that fashion.

If I were interested in men I’d be able to get a good man and would only deal with one that was on my level, however, I’m proudly asexual and am fulfilled and complete as a woman and an individual.

Be Advised/If Not Careful: Danger Ahead

Those who unjustifiably go after and cause harm to others will and shall definitely reap what they sow yet with a much sharper repercussion- miss latoya

 

 It is very unwise to negatively mess with a highly spiritual person or one born with the caul and of naturally inherent occult energy/power. Do not pester their loved ones and do not mistreat their beloved pets.

The universe is watching.

As a mode of caution the tale should be a heed incorporated with both wisdom and warning.

The universe is waiting.

Puzzled or ticked off when the specific ones have no need or desire to get involved with the usual things, the usual people, the usual inauthentic conditioning?

Why disrupt the life of the rare or the distinctive people who keep to themself or who cause no trouble to no one else?

The universe will deliver.

 

Who’s Laughing Now?

Those who’ve done dirt toward me or toward and against my loved ones have so much hell to pay and further retribution is on the way

I didn’t fret at all during that period of undergoing heavy witchcraft. There was no need for me to. I knew spirit had me and that divine intervention would make things right

Adversaries are plagued by medical problems, deaths, social conflict, personal difficulty. They are to suffer greatly it was inevitable.

Adversaries don’t understand why, have they forgotten what they’ve done, or maybe that was my error as to them they did nothing wrong?

So dumb, don’t even know or realize that so much of their troubles stem from their own past actions.

There is no rationality within an ill mind, disturbed and, sick to the core. Oh, but they don’t believe so.

Santeria/Brujeria was done to me out of envy and jealousy in an attempt to change my destiny. Was it really that funny? It wasn’t comedic to me as now it is tragic for you all.

We got the last laugh.

The universe has been so kind and generous to me so faithful and benevolent as can be.

Karma is so much the bitch that I want her to be!

 

 

Endowed

The light that shines within is a light that never comes to an end.

When we stand strong we never go wrong.

Ignore the unsavory pretend as if they weren’t even there.

There are people who can’t move on as we continue to live our life those certain people who won’t let go.

They have an unhealthy unnatural attachment to us. A unreciprocal connection tied from the lowest depths of hell.

Servants enabled by their master to perform abysmal acts.

They envy the love between others.

In return, they sabotage the most harmonious relationships.

Jealous because they have to go out to obtain a false love.

Miserable because they are not desirable enough to acquire genuine love.

It is an honor, It is truly an honor, It is a great honor to be endowed.